I stopped in to Fat Nat’s Eggs in New Hope last week for lunch, and the person seated next to me at the counter asked the waitress about salads.
Don’t go to Fat Nat’s and ask about salads.
“We don’t do salads here,” the waitress said to my neighbor. “We’re called Fat Nat’s for a reason. Fruit, salads, we don’t do any of that here.”
The menu speaks to you in the very same tone. Look at “Specialties” and read its warning about substitutions. The rule applies to the omelettes, too, but this menu doesn’t repeat itself. Instead, you get: “We explained this before.” And that’s the nice side – the lunch menu offers a hard stance on plate-garnishing and wraps with a stern warning to would-be loiterers.
Hey: you don’t go to Fat Nat’s Eggs to be coddled. You go to be FED, and FED you will get. When was the last time you went through your day, going nuts, looking forward to your next breakfast? Not many breakfasts can do that, but breakfast at Fat Nat’s most certainly does. These eggs aren’t like the other eggs.
Behind Fat Nat’s Eggs is one Jeff Nat, whose name you’ll see all over golfing awards at the New Hope location. You’ll see trophies shining atop a divider in the dining room, and half a wall worth of plaques. You’ll see the championship belt Nat won last year at the Tamarisk Country Club. When I asked a waitress about the belt, she confirmed what the plaques lead on to: Nat’s good.
Fat Nat’s Eggs first opened in New Hope in 2003, and has since branched out to Brooklyn Park and St. Anthony Village. Here’s the Fat Nat’s website, but I should point out they close at 1 p.m. during the week and 2 p.m. on weekends.
The New Hope and Brooklyn Park locations both have their own Facebook pages, but neither one has posted or even changed pictures since November 2014. There have been no Twitter posts since 2010, and I didn’t see an account for them on Instagram. I imagine Fat Nat with a flip phone like the one I had back in 2005 or 2006. I imagine him flipping it shut and telling someone, “Facebook, Instagram, we don’t do any of that here.”
The eggs benedicts are listed at the top of the menu, and they’re the first things I suggest you try. The bacon avocado eggs benedict brings it, straight-up. Spicy avocado verde, and they mean it. Tomato. Bacon. Enough hollandaise for your bennies, enough for your hashed browns, enough for your coffee. But the stars of this show are a pair of perfectly-poached eggs. If #YolkPorn really is a thing, these belong in the back room of the video store for sure.
If spicy food isn’t your jam, basic bennies can be had with corned beef or ham. There’s another with turkey, tomato, and spinach. There’s a vegetable benedict, too, if you’re into that.
You can upgrade from American fries to hashed browns for 50 cents more. Do it. You can add cheese and onions to your hashed browns, too, but these upgrades are $1.50 apiece. Me? I just get cheese.
If you’re used to someone else’s three-egg omelettes, you’re going to have a lot of questions when you see Fat Nat’s three-egg omelettes. How do the cooks at Fat Nat’s do so much with only three eggs? What are the other guys doing wrong? Are they actually just using two eggs? Is Fat Nat’s actually using four?
A chili cheese omelette is an occasional special, a spicy beef and bean force barely contained by an egg scramble. Two crispy tortillas are stashed underneath, because why not? If you hit Fat Nat’s when the chili cheese omelette is featured, that will probably be your day’s high point. Just eat it and go back to bed.
Several of the breakfast dishes are named after family members, one of which – Emily’s omelette – I nearly talked myself into before having the chili cheese. It’s basically a lower-carb bacon avocado benedict. Fat Nat’s omelette has chorizo, onion, cheese, and tomatoes. You can have it as-is, or you can get the Fat Nat’s Supremo. It’s a Fat Nat’s, stretched out calendar pin-up style on a bed of American fries and draped in a green chili blanket.
There are specialties like the Fat Nat’s Slider – nicknamed “Lazy Man’s Benedict” – and a triple fruit fritter French toast. Fritters aren’t fruit, kapeesh? I got the biscuits and gravy during one visit. They were fine, but they weren’t much different than the biscuits and gravy you get anyplace else.
For the lunch crowd, they offer sandwiches and burgers. Avocado verde and tomato team up again on the Club Nat Verde, a triple-meat-threat sandwich with ham, turkey, and bacon. You can have mac and cheese with bacon. You can have chili (“When Nat feels like making it,”) with “the works,” and I’ve never been as excited to have a restaurant’s works as I am to have the works at Fat Nat’s.